Why the old lady swallowed the spider

A morning like any other. Awoke at 6:30, turned on the computer, kettle and hot water tank, called Jakarta as a back-up alarm for a friend not used to getting up to go to school (but who’s always up and exercising), made tea, logged on and checked email, news, and scores before my first shower of the day.

But this morning I showered again at 10:00. At 8:30 I started mopping my floors. I’d already swept them. And washed the dishes. And done a load of laundry. Until a week ago, it might have been over a year since I’d done dishes or laundry. Or cooked. That stuff’s easy. But the floors… nearly an exercise in futility. Every cm of the ground floor. If I don’t stand in front of the fan after every couple of square Ms, I have to mop the sweat up… it’d be embarrassing in front of witnesses.

And I’m mopping for two reasons – In my work slacks, it’s 8:00 and AGAIN the university transport department fails on the promise to get my driver here on time, and doesn’t call me, just leaves me hanging. And I’m ticked and sitting around twiddling digits. So clean, then.

And – I fired my housekeeper. Why did I fire my housekeeper who costs me all of $30 bucks a month? Took me two weeks to do it, and it still doesn’t sit entirely well with me, but… Because it’s more than the going rate for a full-time housekeeper, and my guy only comes three days a week and still, I kid you not though I wish I did kid, he:
1. NEVER cleaned the bathtub, even when I moved in (I discovered this morning when I did it) or any other surface above the bottom of his feet;
2. did not feel the need to turn lights on when washing dishes, resulting in tea leaves left in a “washed” strainer, oil in a “washed” pan (with cold water to boot, let me remind you);
3. Failed, yes, failed to change a lightbulb with success, nor test it;
4. Left incense ash on a TV table for the duration of his employment (I was testing him)
5. Might have mopped floors, but not around the drains or under tables (hello ‘roach wee)
6. Agreed to Friday but always came early on Saturday AM instead (rage)
7. Folded clothes BEFORE he ironed them (picture that one), and never understood hangers.
OK – I know a lot of it is cultural differences, and it kills me to deprive him, his wife, and his child of my $30 bucks, but what can I do? He was recommended by a (I think) friend, swore he could do the things I wanted him to –I never even developed the confidence to send him shopping or let him cook for me– and clearly couldn’t, and HADN’T before in some cases.

So all that said – I got rid of a lot of tension cleaning house this AM with the music cranked, but it’s not something I want to do very often here – one has only so much water in one’s body, and I came close to swallowing the horse, and not the spider to catch the fly. This man definitely needs a maid on Java.

The driver never came (are the same issues at play here as with the reasons for my housekeeper’s dismissal? If I build all these programs the University wants me to build, how far will they be able to run with the ball once I’m gone, if they can’t even organize themselves to get me to the office?), so I prepared Friday’s seminar at home on my clean couch at my clean table in my clean dry shorts with clean bare feet on clean white tiles….